How to Overcome Insecurities – Generally, all of us are called a narcissistic generation. We know that technology and social media give us an inflated sense of self. But we don’t realize that is not what we feel deep inside.
One underlying emotion overwhelmingly shapes our self-image and influences our behaviour: insecurity. If you could enter the minds of people around you, even the selfish ones, you may encounter ceaseless waves of insecurity.
Now the question which comes to our mind is that, what insecurities? So in this guide, I will explain what insecurities are, their causes and how to overcome insecurities.
Insecurities, what are they?
Usually, many people may feel insecure in different areas of their lives in which they face indecision. Still, all types of insecurity have a common root: lack of self-confidence.
You have maybe felt it repeatedly; Know that those feelings of insecurity were created during childhood. If you experienced an awkward moment or traumatic rejection moment in your youth, there is a high likelihood that you may carry those feelings even in your adulthood.
In addition to developing low self-worth, you may feel as if you are exposed to the whole world and that you do not deserve anything good in life, be it best partners, a good quality job, or just an extended social life.
When we don’t love ourselves and have a deep trust in our skills and abilities, we often wonder how to overcome insecurities in these areas.
Insecurities can be created from numerous sources and subdivided into various aspects of your life.
Types of insecurities
The most common types of insecurities include:
1. Personal insecurities
It includes a lack of confidence about how you look and what others think of you; you may feel anxious in social situations or avoid photos and mirrors. Unfortunately, they often lead to unhealthy habits, which is not suitable for your mental health.
Personal insecurity, in general, involves a lack of self-belief in one’s own capability to do fine and succeed in collective settings.
2. Professional insecurities
Professional Insecurity includes the concern of dropping your job, being denied tenure or any regulations that you could face at your place of employment for failing to comply with the mounted recommendations and norms. This lack of confidence is heightened via the exceptional needs of existence in finance phrases. Losing a process method lack earnings; this makes this Insecurity one of the most common varieties of insecurity.
Professional Insecurity also includes panic at the thought that you may in no way discover another job even as you lose the only one you currently have.
3. Relationship insecurities
With relationship insecurity, someone is unwilling to end up vulnerable and isn’t inclined to trust others. An insecure person may be unable to consider what a person is saying or what they’ll observe via that person’s behaviours as promised by them. These issues impact the person themselves and the people they’re trying to have relationships with.
Relationship Insecurity also includes feelings that you don’t deserve love or that your partner doesn’t care for you. It leads to jealousy and controlling behaviour. None of those are healthy for you or any relationship you are trying to build.
What are the causes of insecurity?
To understand how to overcome insecurities, you first need to know what the causes are. Insecurity is a sensation like any other, and all of your emotions stem from your perspective and thinking.
Following are the leading causes of insecurities.
- Lack of family emotional support ( People with a loving, caring family have less chance to deal with insecurity)
- Lack of physiological need satisfaction (When people are insecure in their food, home, and safety needs, it takes effort to move on to rewarding psychological needs like security)
- Lack of emotional intelligence (Those with low emotional intelligence can’t accurately monitor the feelings of themselves and others, leading to unhealthy relationships and less trust)
- Lack of frankness( When people aren’t open and comfortable with new peoples and situations, they feel more stress and panic, resulting in lower security)
- Lack of kindness (Disagreeable people tend to have more interpersonal conflicts due to not being helpful, supportive, or concerned. These behaviour produce a sense of risk in social situations and less security)
Ways to overcome insecurities
Insecurity produces anxiety about your goals, relationships, and ability to handle certain situations. Approximately everybody deals with insecurity. It can appear in all aspects of your life and come from various causes. So, how to overcome insecurities?
You can overcome insecurities with the help of tools, habits, and techniques. But as those are deeply rooted in your life, you will have to progress step by step, not rushing to make significant changes as those wouldn’t last and would even end up being detrimental. That is where a coach can help you identify and take those steps with you.
1. Steps to overcome insecurities and build self-esteem
- Know and affirm your value
- Prioritize your needs
- Overcome negative thoughts
- Embrace the awkward
- Challenge your thoughts
- Surround yourself with good people
- Reflect on the good and be grateful
- Make time for joy
- Step away
Also Read: How To Control Your Emotions
2. When to seek help and by whom
There’s nothing wrong with social embarrassment. But it’s vital to pay attention to how it makes you feel.
If you feel unhappy, distressed, or lonely daily, there is a need to think about talking to a coach and a therapist who can help you look at the reasons for these feelings. Insecurities can lead in extreme cases to depression. If you feel depressed, please talk with a Therapist as they are equipped with the tools needed to fight this sickness. We, as coaches, can also help you and guide you during the process but as support to the Therapy, not as a replacement. We will help you build up new social skills, sharpen your self-identity, and learn how to go through the consequences of your insecurities, such as social anxiety. This anxiety can make you withdraw from certain communal situations or avoid them altogether. Doing so will impede your life quality and what you could reach in life.
As said before, we all have insecurities; what is important is to know them and know what to do with them, so they don’t impact our lives negatively.
For example, being socially awkward is ok. We are not perfect, but so is the people in front of us. By remembering that and learning tools that will help you pass the awkwardness, you can have an amazing and fulfilling social life with people that will love you for who you are.
After reading this article, I hope you have gained some knowledge regarding insecurities, what they are and who can help you to overcome insecurities.
Often, insecurities build up when we compare ourselves to others and feel less.
They can also come from past trauma and compound over time.
Teenagers often develop personal insecurities. It is due to the changes in their own body and their brain. How they think others see them start to play an essential part in their mind while building their own “self” vision. Consequences can be trouble to sleep, to the point of insomnia (I was sleeping 3 hours a night as a teenager even with sleeping pills at one point), aggression, withdrawal, and depression. If your child is facing those, speak with a professional who can help you understand them and teach you how to help them.